Commuters on the Route 1 tram to Moreland were held for several minutes yesterday morning after the driver announced a delay due to "a person on the tracks," a description later revised, with some reluctance, to "a magpie, technically."
The bird, described by witnesses as "just standing there, completely unbothered," had reportedly claimed a section of track at the Franklin Street and Swanston Street intersection, holding up the outbound tram toward Carlton and showing no interest in relocating, despite the bell, the driver's announcement, and the combined stares of approximately forty passengers.
"I heard 'person on the tracks' and braced for something serious," said one commuter, still holding a coffee that had gone lukewarm during the incident. "Then I looked up and it was just a magpie standing there like the tram was the one interrupting its morning."
The driver's initial wording was reportedly a matter of protocol rather than error, with any obstruction on the tracks — human, animal, or otherwise — triggering the same announcement, a detail commuters found "understandable" but "still very funny in hindsight."
The magpie held its position for close to three minutes before departing, unhurried, in the direction of the Melbourne City Baths, having delayed a two-carriage tram, an unconfirmed number of connecting trains, and at least one job interview.
"It didn't even look at us on the way out," the commuter added. "No acknowledgement. Nothing."
At time of publication, the tram was running to schedule, the magpie had not been located for comment, and the phrase "person on the tracks" remained, technically, accurate.